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The Crows Crows Crows International Airport

You are inside of an airport inside of a dream.

You check your dream phone to see an email from Crows Crows Crows, the dream team behind The Stanley Parable: Ultra Deluxe.

You think “Wow! Am I dreaming?”

You think “Oh great, is this finally it? Are we finally going to get that release date? Is this the moment? Could it be?”

We’re gonna be honest with you. Not yet. But we’re so close, the team is working like clockwork finishing the new endings with more content and we are so excited to share it all with you as soon as we can.

We know how important the game is to many of you and we’re taking the time to make sure it reaches a level of quality that you (the “gamers”) and we (the “developers”) are happy with. Thank you so much for your patience. As for the launch date- wait who is this dude wait don’t do this!!!! I was just getting to the good stuff!!!

Hey sleepy head. Wake up! I have an important question!

Are you also going to the Crows Developer Conference 2021? Kinda real stoked about all the neat online networking opportunities.

It’s really informative, last year I learned cool social media tricks, how to use Photoshop blend modes, and how to format my speech to include animated gifs.

But obviously you were there and know all this- Oh? This is your first time going to CDC? Well don’t worry I’m kind of a CDC buff. Let me tell you all about it.

CDC is one of those hot new online conferences that take place in a desktop/laptop web browser (very similar to RuneScape). Legitimate games industry professionals (such as myself) network, attend talks and vent about the lack of new information on the development of...

The Stanley Parable: Ultra Deluxe

You see, that classified information is important to me because the developers of TSPUD really haven’t been telling us anything about it. I know that every morning they must wake up and have another meeting about how much closer the game is to completion, the bugs being fixed, the content being added.

But they tell us nothing about that at all! They just say “New Endings” and “More Content” over and over and over again! And what does that mean SPECIFICALLY? That’s all they’ve said about the game since 2019, back when Geoff Keighley dropped the first trailer. They won’t even tell us which platforms they’re launching on!! I don’t think I can take one more CDC without specific NEW information or media about The Stanley Parable: Ultra Deluxe.

All I know is that from April 12th to April 26th (which is when the expo floor is open) I’ll be all over the place, searching every nook and cranny for clues and any morsels of TSPUD. If I don’t find anything I don’t know what I’ll-

Ugh. My stomach is acting up from all this hoping and complaining. Could you hold on to my badge for me? I really don’t want it to get dirty. It’s not the laminated kind. But it’ll get you through the conference doors alright.

Your CDC 2021 badge

Thank you!

And if you want to talk more about CDC or The Stanley Parable: Ultra Deluxe please take my business card:

Discord Membership Card

See ya on the show floor. Now… where’s the -- hnngggGG - bathroom...